Mentally sluggish


This week… I’m struggling mentally… I’ve found I haven’t had much motivation this past week… I’ve even gotten behind on my homework… I’ve been trying to catch up… Mentally I feel sluggish. I haven’t written on here until today when I’m posting this… I think with staying in the house so much I’m just struggling to do stuff. I don’t know maybe I’m getting stir crazy being cooped up. I’m trying to be productive but finding it difficult to do stuff. I want to do more but finding I’m losing all motivation late afternoon. 

Cooking… I’ve been cooking regular meals but I haven’t baked much. I’ve gotten a lot of pans and cookie cutters. I want to make sugar cookies now lol. I got a bundt pan because I didn’t have a big one and it came with a cover for the cake after being made. I like that it came with a cover to store the cakes in.

Start juicing… I bought a juicer because I want to start juicing. I want to be able to detox and get healthy. 

Schoolwork… Like I said I’ve been behind on my school work. I’m trying to catch up so I don’t get too far behind in stuff. I enjoy the classes I’m in I just get hit with a wave of depression and my schoolwork suffers. In communications this past week we learned about religions around the world. I was assigned to Buddhism. I know a good deal about it because of DBT. The creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy is a Catholic-Buddhist. So during DBT we learn about meditation and controlling our thoughts. We learn about how our minds are what’s known as a monkey mind. Basically, we grasp at any and every thought that comes to mind. We hold onto that thought until we start mentally freaking out over nothing. I had to talk about what I found interesting that I didn’t know already. And I struggled with that. I ended up turning in the assignment late because I’ve been struggling mentally. I still need to go into the discussion and do replies to my classmates about the religions they were assigned. In ASL I did a story about 3 bats. Here’s the video if you know ASL.

This is the ASL gloss. Let me know if you want the English translation. But you can get the gist of it from the Gloss format.

3 bats one small name J-O-E one medium one name Edward one big one named Jacob 

Flowers little bat J-o-e search for find many N-E-C-T-A-R full  

Home he go-to-sleep.  

Medium bat E-d-w-a-r-d fly around find bugs. 

Find many big bugs eat many too full to fly tree he sleeps 

Big bat J-a-c-o-b search for fruit find mangos 

Smelled good ate much(too heavy) home he go-to-sleep  

If you want to see more videos of me signing let me know I can post more. I think I might do some story cubes and create stories and post videos of the stories. I think that’ll be fun to do. I need to practice my ASL more. If anyone wants to Zoom and do a story cubes game night let me know.

Makeup… I should take pictures of the makeup I got… and I should do my makeup lol… I got a great deal of makeup lately. I think I’m going to make a separate post about the makeup I got and if I can swatches. I don’t know I might make a video talking about it but that’s if I get the time and the house to be quiet for a few while I make the video.

The animals… The animals are doing good. Angel stood on her hind legs and put them on my shoulders. Her head was up to mine. So she’s 5’5″ long and still growing lol. They really need baths and their nails trimmed. They like to paw at us when they want something and the nails are very pointy. They’re not sharp like the cats but they are pointy and very apparent.

Crafts… I’ve been trying to do more crafts to help with my mental health. I thoroughly enjoy doing crafts. It really helps me mentally to do something creative.

Since learning to sew I’ve been getting cloth to sew more. I’m finding I’m enjoying the process of measuring cutting and then sewing things together. I got some cloth for a quilt. Moms going to show me how to make it.

I got patches for my jean jacket that I just bought. I’m going to dye the jacket black then I’m going to iron these on. I have more on the way I’ll post a picture once I get them and get them on the jacket. I’m excited to put them on. I know if they don’t stick I’m going to sew them on.



Surprise December Glossybox


Got an unexpected package today from Glossybox. 

I think it's supposed to be like a Christmas gift our something. But in it I got "forest essentials luxurious ayurveda" bath and shower oil in madurai jasmine & morgra, "heart land" fragrance bath salt in white ginger, "mark." lipstick in the color m.powerment petal, "pleats please" by issey miyake purfume, "wella" velvet amplifier which is a style primer, "zoya" nail polish in the color storm, lastly a Jewelmint necklace that is a tiny empty bottle. 

I'm very happy with this surprise (^_^). I also made a video on youtube talking about it. The link to that is,

So till my next post. Laterz!

December 2012 beauty boxes


I wanted to post the makeup boxes I've gotten for December 2012. So here's some pictures and a short descriptions of what all in them. 


Beautyarmy beautybox in it is "not your mothers: shes a tease hair spray." "mighty leaf tea" in "green tea tropical" "skinn" twin set in the color "coral poppy" "bath and body works" shower gel in "pink chiffon" "whip hand pigment" from the camo collection in the color "green beret" then my mystery sample is "besame" "crimson rouge" for lips and cheeks. 


Glossybox in it came "incoco" nailpolish "arganics" "argan oil" "skin and co" "truffle serum" "Glossybox blush" in "glossy rose wood" then lastly "illamasqua" liner in "2b1 honour" 


Ipsy/myglam bag. In it there's "urban decay" eyeliner in "zero" "mai couture" highlighter paper "Mirabella" primer for face and eyes "NYX" loose pearl shadow in the color "19 mink pearl" "be a bombshell" lip gloss in "hot mess" then of course the bag it all comes in.  


Birchbox in it is, "emily's chocolates" fortune cookie "juicy couture" "nick chavez beverly hills" shampoo "juice beauty" "eyeko" skinny liqud eye liner in "purple" and a card to rent a dress from "rent the runway" pretty sure I won't use it. The only 2 things I'm happy about with this box is the purfume and the eyeliner. I really don't like getting shampoo in these boxes especially when they don't come with conditioner. And I'm not happy about the chocolate because, I can't eat it and it's not gluten-free so yeah. Not the best box.  


Glamourdoll eyes O.T.M. in it I got 3 full size jars in the colors "cat in a parka" "you've got coal" and "laced with snow" then 2 samples from an upcoming collection in the colors "imitation" and "exposed". Then I got a brush from Sedona lace it's a tapered blending brush 863. Lastly i got "bright eyes" a cream highlighter I'm guessing this is going to be a new product from them. Oh and i also got a small candy cane. 


Pop sugar must have box. In it was "bodum bistro mugs" "tea forte" "jaboneria marianelle soaps" "pinch provisions minimergacy kit" then lastly "bogdons peppermint poles". I'll admit I'm not too thrilled with this box but oh well. Mugs are nice and I'll use the tea. I dunno if I'll use the little kit they sent. Might use the soap even though I'm not too fond of bar soap. And the candy, I can't have, so those are going to someone else.

So those are my boxes for December. I'll try to post at least these once a month. Though, I'll probably post them after I get them all so around this time next month too. I might post the other stuff I purchased, not fully sure at the moment, but I'll think about it. So that's it for now. I'll try to post more often on here. (^_^) till next time. Laterz!

Oh and here's a link to the Youtube video I made for the boxes. I share my thoughts on each box a little bit more (^_^)

Stuff… New Year… Yeah…


Okay, first post of this year! 

What to talk about first? Hmmm… I know!

Went and saw Paranormal Activity 3 last night. Did a double date with my friend. The movie was good. Not great but good. It was better then the first two. Like the first two it started out pretty slow. Some things started popping up about a quarter the way through it. But nothing dramatic till about half way through the movie. The end was good. I think the fourth one is going to be about the grandma being in the witch cult. Would I pay 10 bucks to see it? No. Would I pay a dollar to see it? Yes. And that's just what we did. Sense it was at the cheap theater here in town and every Wednesday they have all movies for a dollar. Would I see it again? Prolly not. It was good but not something I'd watch again. Ya know? Haven't really watched any other new movies. 

Trying to plan out Valentines day early. Not sure what to get Brandon >.< This will actually be the first time buying a valentines day present for someone. I don't know what to get him. I know I'm just going to get everyone else the little sweet heart candy's. 

Still doing Youtube video's. Posting a new one tomorrow. It's about my tattoo's and piercings. Trying to think of other video's to do. 

Slowly getting back into writing. Key word – slowly…

I want to try and read at least thirty books this year. Hopefully I can do it so I can make more video reviews. 

Oh and I don't have a new year's resolution. I find it pointless. I know I'll do something if I really want to. No point in reluctantly making a resolution when I'm not even sure if I'll follow through with it. So I'll do something that needs changing in my own time. Not when everyone else is.

Okay, I had a thought to write about and now I lost it. Well, till it comes back I'm gonna go for now. Laterz!



Okay, I know I'm a bit behind on posting on here. Haven't really been busy, just lazy. The most I've done in the past few weeks is order Christmas present's out of a magazine, watch movies, and play around online. So yeah, lazy. I'm not going to post what present's I got for people in case some of those peoples read this.

Haven't read much. Though, still got a pile of books sitting here and a few on my kindle now. They are all waiting to be read. I'm going to have to kick myself to read them so I can do review's like I want to on youtube. 

I'm going to do reviews on some beauty products that are being sent to me through gogogirlfriend and influenster. I haven't signed up for any other places yet. Prolly not going to till the holidays are over with. I'll admit this month is going to be tight with money that's for sure. 

Brandon has an entire month off from work, due to the holidays. So, it's going to be tight on him too. But I'm going to do my best to help him during that month. I was able to before he got a job so I can do it again. His birthday is coming up and I still need to get him a present. I have an idea but I need to go check it out before I'm certain I want to get it for him. 

I haven't seen very many new movie's. Just went and saw Breaking dawn and we rented trandformers 3. We also got the Green Hornet, but still need to sit down and watch it. Oh and we got the last harry potter. I'll admit that one was a  lot better then I thought it would be. Not sure if I'm gonna go see a movie in theater's for a little while. Nothing out that I'm jumping around that I have to see. 

Well, not much else is going through my head except that I'm hungry and not sure what to eat. Hmm, I think I'll leave this post right here. I'll post again if I think of other stuff to talk about. So, till then. Laterz! 



Update, update, update lol. I’m tired and I’m posting on here. I’m uploading a vlog to youtube right now. So yeah, I haven’t been doing much besides sleeping. I’ll try to do another entry here in a couple days. so yeah not much to say. I said pretty much all i needed to in my vlog. I’ll post the video on here when its done.

la de da, waiting, la de da.

Well, I started playing my lil gay boy on wow again. but its been so long playing a pally and they’ve chenged so much about them I pretty much have to relearn how to play him. And it sux! Still playing Loonybin and Ellenor and relearning how to play Elle too. Such a pain in the ass… (still waiting so I’m jabbering about nonsense)…

feeling really nausiated so gonna shut it till the upload on the video is done….



"Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all."
Emily Dickinson

Another quote, another day. So, the meaning of this quote to me is. People who have hope within their hearts are those who always see’s the light and the good within life. They pray for good and happiness. I like this quote. It was the first one I read online so I chose to write my thought on it.

I have hope within myself. Always have. My hope is for happiness. Not only for myself but for those around me. I love my friends and family. I hope for them more so then myself.

Now on to other stuff, I finally got a hearing for SSI. It’s in may. Now just got to wait and see how it goes. If they deny me at this. I don’t know what I’m gonna do. I’ll prolly have to find someone to hire me who understands someone with seizures. Or just go back to school, I dunno. I’m just sick and tired of all this. I wish these never started in the first place. I wish I didn’t have them anymore. but it’s something I can only hope for.

I was gonna film a youtube video yesterday but my batteries died before I could. Always sucks. So, I gotta count change so I can buy some. That or ask someone if they have a couple that I can have for my camra.

i’m thinking about finding pictures of animals and doing my makeup inspired by them. My first look is going to be based off of the Golden Pheasent. If you don’t know what that animal is look it up. It’s one of the most beautiful birds I’ve seen. Not sure what animal I’m going to base my makeup off of next but I’ll look and see what I find. But when I do the look I’ll post the picture on here for ya to see.

So yeah, don’t got much else to talk about at the moment but I’ll post again when I got something on my mind. Anyways, till then. Laterz!

Blah Blah Blah….


Yes I’m still behind on making video’s but i’ll get  back to doing them here soon. I’ve been feeling alot better the past few days. Been trying to read. Also, been watching movies a lot. I have about 23 video’s planned out its just getting them filmed and uploaded and what not. So yeah, I got things sorted out its just getting around to doing them.

I was happy that I was able to dye my hair. Dyed it black again. Got tired of being half brown half black lol. Been doing my makeup as usual. Just haven’t practiced doing anything new. I should though…

The state cut down how much I’ll be getting every month again. how the hell do they expect a person to live off of $197 for a month. To be able to pay bills and to take care of themselves on that little bit. I think it’s just bull shit. I’m so tired of this. I hate that I can’t work. I hate that I’m limited on things. I would like to just get my life figured out so I can either go to school or get a job. I don’t want anything other then that. Why is that to much to ask for. But when I try to get all sorted out my body basically says fuck you. Then I end up having a seizure. It’s so messed up. I hate this. Oh well, I’ll get something figured out.

So there’s my rant for the day.

Well, I decided if I can get $50 to spend on my self I’m gonna get the other side of my lip pierced. I asked for my tounge pierced for my birthday. My mom said we’ll see if we can afford it that month. So yeah, I figure thats better then asking for a tattoo that can possibly cost up to $200. My brothers don’t think it’ll cost that much but I want to be on the safe side and have that much on me just in case.

Anywho’s, that’s pretty much it for now. I’ll try to do another post soon, but we’ll see. I only post when I got stuff to talk about. So yeah, till next time. Laterz!