March was a doozy of a month O.o

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March was a doozy of a month. We had our finals for school, and now everyone has to stay home due to the covid-19 virus. So did I pass my classes? I passed 3 out of the 4. Not surprisingly, I didn’t pass math. So I have to retake it. Hopefully, with this different teacher, I’ll be able to pass the math class. So, far I like what she has to say in her syllabus. I don’t know if we’re starting classes on the 6th or the 13th. I know Brandon doesn’t begin until the 17th of April. They said we’re supposed to get our financial aid on the 8th of April. I know the banks are supposed to stay open, so hopefully, we’ll be able to get money off of it to pay our bills. Otherwise, we’re paying our bills with our school cards, and I’ll have to figure out how much to pay off of each card.

I realized I forgot to put the shortening and butter in the fridge for the pie crust. I’m also going to make a rough puff pastry. Its the easy way to make puff pastry. I saw it a lot on The Great British Baking Show. It’s where I saw that cake that I want to make and other things that make me want to make them. Oh, watching them make meringue made me want to try and make it again. I tried years ago to make it but failed miserably, so I want to try again.

I need to get my schedule back to normal. I’m staying up past midnight and sleeping until almost noon. I can’t keep this schedule when school starts.

I got some fake nails and put them on and painted them. They’re not with acrylic, only the nail. I didn’t want to do all the acrylic. That would take me forever, and with no proper sanding tools, yeah, it would take a long time.

Dog’s are playing. Cats are sleeping. Brandon is playing the PS4. Mom’s drinking coffee and watching TV. I’m sitting here drinking coffee, and soon as I’m done, I’m going to heat some water and wash my face. I’m making cleaning my face a routine during the day and night. Heating the water and being mindful of the process of washing my face. I’m trying to think of what skill that is from DBT, but there’s a specific skill that you can practice so your in the moment and just focusing on the process of what you’re doing. I’ll ask my therapist what skill that is. I think that’s the skill I’ve been using cooking.

Mom suggested I talk about having to stay home because of the virus when I want to go to school. To be honest, it’s not any different from when I was in a mental state not to leave the house what so ever. My anxiety and depression made it to where I didn’t want to go anywhere. The less I went places, the happier I was before. Now, yes, I want to go to school, and I’m going a bit stir crazy, not leaving, but I’m doing better mentally. I’m cooking and trying to make a positive thing out of this. I’m definitely in a better mental state now than when I was before when I didn’t want to leave the house what’s so ever. I’m working on writing on here and cooking. Whereas before, I wouldn’t do anything and just lay in bed doing nothing.

So I’ve put the chore chart back in place. We’re going to do $30 for the end of the month prize for the person with the most points. I got these chore charts off of amazon, and I wanted to encourage cleaning around the house not just for me but for everybody. I want the chart to be in place when we move in with Richard and the girls. Though, I might put in a different prize for the girls, so they’re getting rewarded for their chores. But I’ll have to talk to Richard and see what he wants to do.

I made the pie crust, and that’s resting in the fridge. Now I mixed up, and I’m baking the dog treats. What I put in them is

Dog treats

16 ozs or 1 lb of peas frozen-thawed

1 lb of broccoli from frozen-thawed

3 cups shredded carrots fresh

1 tbsp coriander

1 ½ tbsp ground ginger

1 ½ tbsp ground cinnamon

1 cup organic PB fit peanut butter

1 cup steel-cut oats

Four eggs

¾ cups water

Heat oven up to 350 degrees. Mix everything. Put on parchment covered cookie sheet in an even layer. Bake for 50 minutes. Let them cool completely, then cut as big or as small as you want. Refrigerate the rest.

So the dogs love the treats I made for them they’re going nuts over them lol.

I made enough pie crust for three pies and one quiche. I wanted to make a potato, onion, and cheese quiche.

So, what to talk about?

I painted my nails pink with a copper accent nail. They’re a bit messy looking, but I like them. I also fudged them up before they dried, so a couple looks like crap. So far, I’ve been able to do my contacts with the nails.

Oh, I plucked my eyebrows because they were becoming one lol. I was able to see them after I put in my contacts and saw they needed plucking. So I plucked them, and I’m thinking of doing my makeup just not sure.

I’m thinking of making a pineapple curd. We have everything to make it except the cornstarch. I think pineapple curd with a lemon or line curd would taste amazing. I could make haupia and put it with that that would taste wonderful. We’ll see if anyone on Facebook will give up a recipe that I can use so I can try and make it.

I made a garlic and herb bread. It turned out so much better than the last one I made.

They turned out so good I want to make grilled cheese out of a slice of it. You can’t see in the picture, but they’re huge lol. Brandon said they look like hamburger buns lol. They were right out of the oven in this picture.

I think food is my escape from my worries right now. Cooking does make me happy, and it’s a nice distraction. I’m going to make breadsticks filled with cheese too.

I made pineapple curd, and it tastes so good. I’m going to make lemon curd and key lime curd for pies and cream puffs.

I didn’t get to make the lemon curd, but I’m going to make that tomorrow. But I did make cinnamon rolls which didn’t turn out, so I’m going to try a different recipe. I found one that might work, but we’ll see after I make them. But the curds were so good!

Today I’m making lemon curd along with trying that new cinnamon roll recipe. I need to do the dishes first, and I already promised to make cream puffs so I might make those first then make the cinnamon rolls. Oh, and I still need to blind bake my pie crusts so I can make the haupia and pineapple pie with meringue for that pie too. I have some dried beans I can use to blind bake them.

I’ve made this post mostly about food. I just can’t seem to think about anything else, especially with how I’ve been cooking. My entire therapy appointment, all I talked about was food. My therapist said she hadn’t eaten lunch, and I was making her hungry lol. It’s funny she like garlic just as much as I do. But I have been making sure to wear my Slytherin apron that Brandon got me for our wedding anniversary.

I love Harry Potter, and when I went onto the website, I got sorted into the house Slytherin. I so wish I could go down to Florida to visit Harry Potter World at Universal Studios. I was to get my wand and robes. But for now, I’ll just rock my apron while I cook. I should try and do something Harry Potter themed when I cook. I want the Harry Potter cookbook. I have that cookbook on my wish list on Amazon along with the Lord of The Rings cookbook. I also have other cookbooks on there that I want from the Great British Baking Show. Though, I should look on Thriftbooks to see if I could order them cheaper. I don’t know we’ll see kind of wish I could share my wishlist on there for people to order from and get it sent to me. Like you can find on Amazon. I have a wishlist for my birthday wants, and they’re all cookbooks lol. I do enjoy reading cookbooks. I like learning about how to cook things, especially sweets.

I need other things to talk about on here lol. I know I took a couple days off from writing on here to bake, but I also didn’t know what to talk about. No one is giving me ideas of what to talk about on here.

I haven’t been doing a whole lot besides baking and watching TV. Well, more watching movies on VUDU and TV shows on Netflix.

I’ve been listening to music every night before bed. I haven’t listened to rock music for a long time, and I’ve been enjoying listening to it before bed. I have Amazon music so I can listen to music, and I’ve been able to listen to the newest stuff on there but also the old stuff I enjoy. When I get money, I want to buy the songs I really like so I can have them on my computer—been really into listening to Five Finger Death Punch, Skillet, Disturbed, and Korn. I know I haven’t just sat and listened to those bands in a couple of years. I’m so out of the loop with music I don’t know what’s in anymore lol. I feel so old because of that lol.

With this virus, it’s making it hard for people to go out and do stuff. I’m not complaining; I’m just stating a fact. The only thing that’s been changed drastically is I can’t go to the gym, and the house is too small to workout in. I’d end up tripping over the animals or bumping into my mom and husband. And I don’t know if I should go for walks beside it’s getting sunny and I don’t want to be in the sun lol.

So I made the lemon curd, and it tastes of lemon but not as Tarte maybe because I used Meyer lemons. Through all of my cooking, I came up with my curd recipe.

So I made the cinnamon rolls again, and they turned out this time. I’m glad I used this recipe, and they turned out perfectly. Though I didn’t put the cream cheese topping on, I kinda wanted them without. But ya never know I might change my mind. I forgot to take a picture, and I’m sure you know what cinnamon rolls look like lol.

That’s it for now if you have anything you want me to talk about just let me know.

Baking to pass the time

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Not having homework and whatnot, I don’t know what to do with myself. I feel like I should be doing something. I’m probably going to be cooking a lot because I don’t know what else to do with myself. I’m going to be starting school either on the 6th of April or the 13th. When I’m able to message my teachers, I’ll ask them what day we start. I need to go to the school for my books. Same with Brandon, we need to go to the school for his books. It’s going to be a pretty penny for them. I hope I have enough on my credit cards.

So I ordered Sei Bella Revital skincare through my brother’s business called Melaleuca. He signed me up as a customer, and I ordered that as my first order. I really wanted to try the skincare and how well it works. So, I’m going to try it for a month and do a side by the side of now when I first tried it to the 30-day mark. If I really like it, I’m going to order it again and keep using it. I want to try the cosmetics and hair care through them. That way, I can give a full review of their products. I’ve already tried their cleaning products and really like them. The toilet cleaner got a stain off the toilet that I’ve been trying to get since we moved in. The laundry detergent works really well and makes our clothes smell really lovely. What I really like about the products is they’re all-natural. So, there’s nothing harmful in the products and won’t cause irritation to your skin. The skincare doesn’t have a strong smell to them; it smells lightly of herbs. It’s not an obnoxious smell, it’s light and subtle. So far, my skin is really soft after using it. When I went with my brother, mom, and dad to learn more about his company, I won a cup that keeps your drink at the same temp no matter what. It works so good. I love having warm coffee for more than an hour. I don’t drink my coffee very fast so it staying warm is really lovely.

I’ll do a more in-depth review of the products once I try them more.

What to talk about?

I feel like I should be doing something! What to do?!

Oh, I didn’t realize the picture was a little blurry, but Angel is already half the size of the couch. I can only wonder how much she weighs now. The sofa is mom’s bed, and that’s why there are so many blankets and pillows on the couch. I need to get a good one of Dasiy too. Maybe take a picture of them standing on their hind legs to show how big they are now.

So now I making bread again this time, just two white loaves. I’ll do another later with flavorings and whatnot. I’ll post pictures once it’s done. It’s been so long since I just baked for the fun of it. I’m really like doing this. I’m going to make cookies and more bread. I’m planning on making some pies with a hot water crust. I’m trying recipes I wouldn’t usually work. I think it’s a good thing that I’m doing this. It’s helping me emotionally. Ooo, maybe I should make fresh pasta! Oh, and I’m planning on making soft breadsticks I might stuff them with cheese lol.

Here’s the picture of the bread I made. The food turned out really good. I put pretzel salt on the outside just because we had it lol. 

Well, I’ve baked bread, and I’m making cookies. I’m already made 4 dozen cookies. I make red velvet and white chocolate chip macadamia nut.

I’m planning on making chocolate chip, espresso chip, and salted caramel chip. So in all, I’m going to make about 10 dozen cookies. Then I’m going to make a pie than some more bread. I just haven’t figured out what to do with myself now that I’m not focusing on school. I’m probably going to be like this all spring break. Here are the recipes I followed for my cookies:

Cookie base

2 ¼ cups flour

½ tsp salt

¾ tsp baking powder

¾ cups (1 ½ sticks) butter

1 cups + 2 tbsp brown sugar

1 cups + 2 tbsp caster sugar

3 large eggs

1 tsp vanilla

2 bags of chocolate chips of choice

 

Cream butter and sugar together until well combined. Add one egg at a time, letting each addition incorporate evenly. Add salt vanilla and baking powder. Let it mix evenly. Add flour half a cup at a time so it can incorporate evenly. Then add chocolate chips of choice. Let rest for a couple hours in the fridge. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and bake until golden, usually about 12-15 minutes depending on oven. If your oven runs high in temp cook at 325 until golden.

Notes: If you want them chocolate as chocolate cookies, replace ¾ of flour with cocoa powder. I use this base for my cookies and add whatever chocolate chips I have at the time. I put espresso flavor and white chocolate chips for one, another I did salted caramel and milk chocolate, then I made a plain chocolate chip.

 

White chocolate macadamia nut cookies

½ cups of butter

4 ounces of cream cheese

1 cup caster sugar or sweetener of choice.

¼ tsp salt

1 egg

1 tsp almond extract

½ tsp baking powder

1 ¾ cups flour

2 cups macadamia nuts chopped toasted if you like

4 cups white chocolate chips

 

Cream together butter and cream cheese. Add sugar until incorporated. Add the egg, almond extract, salt, and baking powder. Once everything is well integrated, add the flour ½ cup at a time. Once combined, add chocolate chips and macadamia nuts. Fold in them in. Allow resting for 2 hours in the fridge. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and bake for 15 minutes.

Note: I think I want to try adding honey to this and see how it tastes. I think doing that instead of sugar would be really good.

 

White chocolate chip red velvet cookies

1 ¾ cups flour

3 tbsp cocoa powder

1 ½ tsp baking powder

½ cup butter

2 large eggs

¾ tsp vanilla extract

1 tsp coconut vinegar

1 tbsp red food coloring

4 cups White chocolate chips

 

Cream together sugar and butter together until light and fluffy. Add one egg at a time, then add vanilla, coconut vinegar, and food coloring allow to mix thoroughly. Add cocoa powder and allow that to mix carefully then add baking powder. After that’s mixed well, add the flour ½ cup at a time. Gently fold in white chocolate chips. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and bake for 12-15 minutes depending on if you want then soft or crunchy.

Note: I thought about making a cream cheese frosting to put on top of the cookies. I think that would make it really good.

I found this online and made it to my liking. There were some elements that I liked to change and make it somewhat my own. I would give credit I just can’t find them now I don’t know what I put in to search for them lol oops. If they look familiar, let me know so I can edit this post with credit to you.

I’m not sure what happened to the recipe for the bread, but if you look up basic yeast bread dough, it should come up, hopefully, lol.

So I organized my skincare a bit, but I want to get the stuff from the bathroom organized. Just to make sure it’s all in the same place, and I don’t have to hunt around for it.

So, yesterday mom and I went to the store and used our credit card to get food for the next couple weeks because the governor put in effect no leaving the house unless necessary for like doctor appointments, meds, and food. Otherwise, there’s no need to leave to go anywhere. We’re planning on just staying indoors and waiting until the order is lifted. Though, I’m going to go to project beauty share Monday. I should be free of this cough by then.

I ordered food for the animals and a toy for the dogs. They absolutely love it! It looks like a stick, and they keep playing with it. Hopefully, it lasts. It’s supposed to be for aggressive chewers. I just realized we’re low on training treats, so I just ordered more. My credit card is going to be so full after all this is done.

I have my therapy appointment today, we’re doing it over the phone again. We’ll be doing it over the phone for a while until this virus blows over.

I’ve made the cookies, and I still need to make the pies. I’m going to make an apple, a blueberry, and a lemon. I’m looking up on how to do a meringue, and I’m probably going to do a Swiss meringue because that actually heats up and cooks the egg whites. I’m going to have to toast the top of it using the oven. Then I’m going to try and learn to make cannoli shells, then I’ll worry about learning to make the fillings. Yes, I know I should be studying pastry lol. Cooking seems to be the only time I feel happy and content. But I don’t want to get into the business and lose that passion I have for it. I don’t know I’m trying to find a job at a bakery. I think that would give me the idea of if I want to pursue that career type. I’m going to finish getting my AA then go into the library Technician program. I really want to finish what I started then go into the pastry program.

Oh, man! I just looked at what books Brandon and I need for school. It’s going to cost a pretty penny. Hopefully, I get my financial aid or my check before then. Have to figure out how to pay for them.

I need to get my schedule back to normal. I shouldn’t be staying up past midnight and sleeping the day in. Tonight I’m going to take my meds at a decent time.

Yesterday mom fell down really hard, she’s hurting pretty bad now. She hit her whole left side on the ground really hard. I wish I could drive so I could take her to the doctors. I really need to get my license.

I’m trying to think of recipes that I can try and make. I want to do more loaves of bread, including a sweet bread. Possibly some cinnamon rolls. But we’ll see how much butter I have after making pies and what not lol. Though, I don’t have cream cheese now to make cream cheese frosting. Oh well, if we have to, we can go get it when we go to get meds.

So far, the skincare I’m trying out is good, it’s been leaving my skin really soft. I’ve been pretty good about washing my face day and night. Moms has been keeping up with cleaning her face day and night too. I organized my skincare and put away what I’m not using while I’m using the Sei Bella. It really gives more room in the bathroom on the shelves. I have so much skincare now, but I’m trying not to use anything other than the Sei Bella. I want to get a proper idea of how it works and if I entirely like it. If I really like it, I’ll get it again next month.

So I’ve been snooping around on the internet on how to make particular cakes. I’ve found one called European sponge cake (genoise). I’ve printed out the recipe, and I’m planning on trying it out. I’ve also looked into making a rough puff pastry and found a recipe that looks easy. I just have to plan that one in advance because I have to freeze the butter and have the flour in the freezer to keep really cold. I think it’ll be a fun thing to make. Maybe I should try making it with the girls sometime or the European sponge cake (genoise). I think they’d have a blast making those. I ordered the big book of the Great British Baking Show. I guess I’ll have a lot to practice once I get that book. I’d love to see if they have the recipes that people made on the show. I’d like to make some of them. Especially the bread filled with either savory or sweet fillings. 

Yesterday I just vegged out and watched the Great British Baking Show. I’m getting inspired to cook watching that show. It’s inspiring to see these home bakers bake on there and be passionate about it.

I think my passion for cooking is coming back, and I’m considering going into baking. I already know if I go into it, I’d start my own patisserie shop with sweets from around the world. I already know what I’d name the business to lol The Witches Candy House. There’s so much I want to learn to bake. I know I want sweets, but I also wish to make savory things as well. There’s so much I can make and learn.

If there’s anything else, you want me to talk about, let me know. I know I’m talking a great deal about food. I’m just getting my passion for it back, and I’m enjoying it. So, yeah, let me know your thoughts and what you like to read about.

Finals soon!

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I’ve been doing what I can to do homework. Yesterday I didn’t get to do what I wanted. I overslept and didn’t make it to Project Beauty Share. I feel awful that I didn’t go. I guess that’s what I get for taking my medications late. I have to take them early tonight so I can wake up in the morning since it’s daylight savings, so we lose an hr of sleep. Monday, Brandon doesn’t have school because they did so good on their final; their teacher gave them the day off from school. Mom said she’d take me, so I don’t have to take the bus alone. This is my last week this quarter for ASL, which makes me sad. I really enjoy the class. I’m excited to go into ASL three. I’m not happy about math, but I’m going to get my work done. I’m currently working on my history class and waiting for a reply from my teacher about possibly interviewing someone from the Spokane Tribe. I want to give the most accurate information on my subtopic paper.

I heard from my professor, and she said that would be an excellent source for my paper. So I emailed someone from the Spokane Tribe asking if I can ask some questions. I just have to wait and hear from them. I’m really hoping they agree, but we’ll see. I’m crossing my fingers; they agree or put me in touch with someone who can help me.

So, I posted about my deaf events here. If you look at my older posts, you’ll see what I wrote about on deaf events. You’ll read my feelings and thoughts on the nights. I’m hoping to go to more deaf events. I want to make friends and learn more about the culture. A couple people asked if I’m going to pursue going into the interpreter field, and I said no, I just love the culture and want to be able to talk to everyone while as a librarian. Communication as a librarian is essential to helping those who need it. That’s why I want to learn Spanish, Japanese, and French. I want to communicate with everyone. I always want to learn more. Learning new things makes me happy, but I know learning other languages isn’t going to be easy, but I know I’ll enjoy it.

So, I cleaned the kitchen yesterday. I wanted to get the bathroom cleaned but didn’t get that far. I got my ASL homework done. I wrote the two papers on my deaf events, did my quizzes, pirated in the discussion. I got some history homework done. Contacted someone from the Spokane tribe to possibly talk to someone about the casino. Ask them questions and get some accurate information on the casino and tribe. I’d say yesterday was productive. I just wish I’d gotten more done.

I’m hoping to go to another deaf event again. I want to make friends as well as practice signing. I’ve been such a recluse throughout the years I want to get out there. Meet new people and make more friends. I wonder if Cindy would like to learn ASL too? So she can meet them also, though, I’m sure they’d be willing to write what they want to say or I could translate, so long as I’m good enough lol. I hope next quarter I can go to the ASL club. This quarter my schedule was just a shit show lol.

I’m going to attempt the choux pastry again today. I won’t make it right before bringing it to work and see doing some with Brandon for his class. I want to make good ones probably with beef and cheese, maybe one with salmon and cream cheese thyme and sage. Hmmm, wonder what flavors I could do?

Well, it looks like I have a job interview at the donut parade today. I look like crap, but I’m going since this is how I look most days. But I’m excited I guess we’ll see if I get the job granted for 2 days I’ll have to wake up super early and be there by 2:20am, but that’s okay. I can do it! But we’ll see if I get the job.

So today, I got up at 4, got to school at 7, worked at the library then went to class. I got the call for the job interview during math. I was so eager to call them back. I just went out into the hall and called. I’m now on my way to project beauty share. Then going to the interview then home.

The interview went okay, I think. He said he’ll let me know in 48 hrs whether or not I got it. He said it’s not a job he expects anyone to stay at. He just wants to be a useful reference. I don’t know how I feel about that. But if I get the job, it’ll be something until I can find something for the long term. I was hoping this could be a place I could be at while in school. But I guess we’ll see what happens.

I had more written on here, and I forgot to save it 😖. Oh well, I’ll try and remember for next time not to do that.

I haven’t heard back about the job yet I guess he might be still thinking about it. Even if I don’t get it, I’m thankful he took time out of his day to interview me. If I don’t hear back today, I guess it’s back to the grind of putting in applications.

This is my last week of ASL!😭 I can’t wait to be in ASL 3. And I’m going to continue to practice and going to deaf events so I can get better. I know I keep repeating myself that I want to communicate with everyone, but it’s how I feel. 😊

I gotta work on my slides for history. It’s going to be a new paper talking about the Spokane tribe casino. I got so into finding research and doing the writing I forgot about the group presentation 😂 oops!

I got there first two books of lord of the rings on audible I’m planning on at least reading one this spring break for the fun of it. I want to read something for the fun of it and not because someone told me to. I mean, I enjoyed the books I read in English, but I want to have the leisure of doing it without having to worry about a paper to write 😂. I’ll get the third book when I get my credit on audible.

I have my appointment with the therapist today. Gotta take a bus to and from there. Mom had an MRI yesterday and couldn’t drive, so they made her take a cab, and they paid for it lol. She was out of it when she came home. She doesn’t even remember eating 2 brownies lol she passed out right after.

Yesterday, it was a long day. I got up at 4 left the house at 5:30am didn’t get home until 6:00pm. Needless to say, I was exhausted. I got on and off the bus, 8 times went to school, therapy, their bank, the pay office, and the store before finally making it home. I woke up today and forgot to take my meds. Thankfully mom said she’d bring them to me before getting the girls.

Oh, I haven’t written on here for a couple days. Wednesday was a very long day, and I passed out not long after getting home. I can see that it is going to be happening a lot, especially if I get the job at the donut place. I’d have to wake up at 1 just to get to work at 2:30am. I’m excited at the possibility of decorating donuts, but if I don’t get it, I’ll look into putting in applications to bakeries. I’m excited at the thought of learning new things. I enjoy learning and want to make sure I never stop learning new things, especially for cooking. Cooking has always been a love of mine, so doing it as a passion is exciting to me. I know everyone says I should just go into the culinary program, but I don’t want to be a regular chef. I’d rather be a pastry chef.

So, what have I been doing the past couple of days? Wednesday, I got up at 4:30am got on the bus at 6am then headed to school. Worked then went to class, and after classes ended, I got on the bus to downtown. I got on another bus to head to the Valley. I went to a Starbucks to kill time until my therapy appointment. I walked to the meeting then got on another bus until it got to Sprague and got off to get onto another bus. Stopped right where the bank was to pull money to pay rent and to pay on my credit card. I got on the bus again and went to the post office then went back onto the bus to downtown. I got on another bus to go to Safeway to buy something for dinner. Then mom picked me up from there since she had to pick up her meds anyways. When I got home at 6pm I was exhausted I had my dinner took my pills and passed out. I couldn’t focus enough to do homework that was due that night. I know it’s going to be worse with exhaustion when I start another job. I know there’s going to be a lot of coffee in my future lol.

Yesterday I did my test in ASL, and I really liked that type of test she did. It was a preview of what the tests are going to be like when I go into ASL 3. I only missed a couple things on my test only because I forgot the details of it, and I even wrote it down in my notes lol. I’m not ready for my ASL test today, but I’m going to do it. I’m worried I’m not going to place everything like I’m supposed to. I don’t want to muddle it all together.

I also saw Cindy and her son yesterday. It was so lovely to visit with her and hold Richard finally lol. I didn’t get to hold him last time I saw him because I was sick and didn’t want to risk him getting sick because he’s so young. I can’t believe he’s 3 months. He’s so cute!

I got so caught up in doing research and writing my paper for history. I forgot to do the group slides for the presentation. I told the teacher I didn’t do it, and she said I need to make sure I do the rest to pass, which I will do tonight. I feel like I let my group members down with not doing my part. I’m going to turn in my paper and do the power reviews. I have to highlight what I change, which is fine.

I’m sitting in math doing nothing because doing my work on my phone gives me a headache, and I’m done with the book work. I pretty sure I’m not going to pass this class but I’m going to do the work asked of me. I’ll admit I’m far behind on the online work, and I can get it done over the weekend.

Oh, yesterday was busy, but it wasn’t if that makes sense. I went to school, got my expressive test done. I didn’t do as well as I had hoped. Oh! I forgot to add what the paragraph was here…

Expressive Paragraph 3/13/2020

Yesterday morning on the farm, my alarm went off at 5:45. I woke up, got dressed, put on perfume/aftershave, grabbed my hat and beer, and headed to the field.  I saw something shiny.  I went to investigate and found a credit card.  I called the police, and a macho old-fashioned cop came.  He said it belonged to the new music teacher on the next farm.  That night she bought me dinner, and we toasted to her good luck! 

It was a doozy of a paragraph, but Kellie-Marie liked that I added the cop asking why they were drinking at 5:45am LOL. I couldn’t help myself; I had to add it. Wednesday, I made Kellie-Marie laugh because we were playing story cubes in class, and I made it in my story the person fell and found a cookie under something and blew it off then ate it. I have so much fun in ASL. I really enjoy learning it. Though she said I usually do really well-putting things into ASL format but during my test, I kept going back into English as I signed. I knew I shouldn’t have practiced it in English then try to do it in ASL. Oh well, there’s always next quarter.

Speaking of Next quarter, this virus that’s going around is making people go crazy. We’re not starting our quarter on the 6th like we were supposed to. We have to start on the 13th. I asked my teacher if we’re going to start class online on the 6th or just start everything on the 13th. I really hope it’s the 6th, but we’ll see.

Otherwise, I worked on homework last night. Richard(my brother) came over with the girls. We had pizza and visited. Which was nice, Lilly worked on her homework because she’s behind. Mom’s computer died, and we didn’t realize it wasn’t plugged in lol. We thought it was, but when mom went to plug something else in, she saw it wasn’t actually plugged in. But Lillian got a lot done.

I’m going to go get stuff to make more choux pastry. I want to make a white chocolate raspberry cream puff. It sounds so good. I’m waiting to fill them up until the night before, so they don’t go soggy before I take them to school. I’ve decided I’m going to fill them with cheesecake and not custard. I’ve been having so much trouble making it I’m going to wait until next quarter when I get my mom and have the money to buy eggs. It takes a lot of eggs and butter to make the choux and the custard. I’m also going to post pictures of my choux after they’re filled and ready to go. I think I might get gluten-free flour next month and make some gluten-free. I want to take a couple to my therapist. I think I should try making macarons too.

I slacked on writing on here, and that bugs me. I want to try and post on here as much as I can before I post it. I know this post is long, but I still didn’t write on here every day, and I like to do it after I wake up. I know a couple of those days I was just so tired I couldn’t think of what I write. Let me know your thoughts on future posts.

Writing helps

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It’s another week into the year.

So, I went and talked to a counselor about my math teacher. She told me if I fail the class, I’ll get a warning from financial aid, and they’ll pay for me to retake the course. I know I need that math for future math classes. So, I really want to pass it and learn it. I just wish I was learning from a teacher that actually cared about your learning. I mean, if you’re working on a problem, he’ll just ask what your doing then give you the answer to the question without explaining how to get it. I get so frustrated with that, and I don’t know how to approach him about it. I’ve asked him how he gets the answer, and he just starts talking about something else that has nothing to do with what I asked. I really want to learn, but its hard when the teacher doesn’t care about you learning the material.

On a positive note, I’m going to see a therapist Wednesday. I was on Psychology today looking for a therapist, and I found someone who was a counselor in my DBT program. I thought it was her, but I wasn’t sure. She emailed me back telling me it was her and said she went into private practice. I can’t tell you how happy I am that I found her on there. I know she’ll help me, and she knows about BPD and DBT. It really helps when you have someone who understands the therapy needed for someone with BPD. Maybe e she’ll be able to help me understand why I feel this way.

I really want to feel more than I do. It’s frustrating not knowing or understanding why I think this way. I don’t know if I need to change my meds or if I just need someone to talk to about everything, and that can help me find solutions to this feeling. I know she’ll work with me and help me to the best of her abilities. I really don’t like feeling empty, and like I can’t communicate with people. I want to have those connections that I see others have, and I just don’t have that. I just don’t know how to connect.

I’m sitting in the bakery here at school, waiting for Brandon to get done. I already ate a danish and now eating chips. I’m in P.E. to help me monitor what I eat and my workouts. I guess I’m not doing an excellent job at my school work.

I do know that writing all this out helps. I’m trying to figure out what to do, so I don’t feel as I do. I want to try and keep up with my blog. I know it’s kind of a new years resolution to do this, but I really want to work at it, so it’s not just during this year but for a long time to come. I know there’s a lot of studies that show writing things out can help a person with how they feel. Granted, it won’t tell me why I feel the way I do, but it’ll help to ease those feelings. I really want someone who can help me with figuring out why I’m the way I am, and that’s why I’m going to see a counselor.

So, it’s a new day. It’s Saturday, and it was nice to sleep in the past 4:30am lol. I’ve been waking up that early all week since now I’m working in the library that early. I did plan on going to the gym and checking the post office today, but I think the only thing I’m gonna get done is going to the gym. We have no hot water in our house, and it’s going to cost an arm and a leg to fix it, so we just go to the gym to shower. I don’t mind; it gives me an extra excuse to go there. I take the opportunity to go there as an excuse to get a work out in.

I’ve been loving having Japanese vegetable curry. It’s been so long since I’ve had it and it’s been a nice change to our usual foods. I really enjoy cooking. I really want to do the culinary school, but I want to finish what I started studying. After I finish studying to be a librarian, I’ll go get my degree in culinary and pastry. I know that means I’ll be in school for the next 6 years, so yeah.

I’m reluctant about the math, but I’ll do what I can, and hopefully, I won’t fail it. I talked to a counselor about it, and she said if I fail it, I’ll get a warning from financial aid, and they’ll pay for me to retake it, but if I fail it again, they’ll suspend me from financial aid. Even though I hate that class, I’m still going to try, it’s just hard when the teacher doesn’t really care. I think I’ll go to the tutors sometime to try and help me with learning the material.

Brandon thinks I’m weird because of the way I eat a swiss roll. I basically deconstruct it as I eat it. I do that to that and to a 3 musketeers. I know I can eat some things unconventionally. I’m also very particular about how items are cooked and washed. It makes me very agitated when things aren’t cooked a certain way or put away a certain way. I don’t know if I’m OCD, I haven’t been diagnosed with it so, for now, I’m going to say I’m just particular about how it’s done.

Well, I haven’t been on here to write for a few days only because I felt really drained mentally. Over the weekend, I worked on just homework and then vegged out. I watched movies and ate fattening food. Yesterday I started out at 4 am I went to school. Worked from 7:15 am to 9:15 am then from 9:30 am until 10:15 am I was in class though I left 5 minutes early talking with my group member about how airheaded the teacher is. We both feel the same way about him and his teaching style. We’re planning on meeting this weekend to study. At 10:25 am I made my way to ASL and had fun in that class, I always have fun in there. It’s my favorite class. After I caught the bus and made my way to Project Beauty Share, and I was there from noon to 2:00 pm. I slowly made my way downtown stopping on the road at the post office, then I met Brandon downtown and had lunch at subway. I came home, and I was exhausted. I worked on homework and went to bed at 6:00pm.

So, today I woke up at 4:30am and got up taking the dogs out to potty. Brandon started his new job last night, and it was overnight. I met up with him downtown this morning. I was so worried about forgetting something of Brandon’s that he would need for school. I forgot to take my morning medications. I couldn’t focus while there, I just did my shift at the library and then made my way home. I also just don’t want to be around anybody. I really need to talk to a therapist. I just want to recluse myself and shut myself off. I’m still eating really unhealthy. Even though I’m tracking what I’m eating, I’m only in the mood to where I don’t care about anything. I was so out of it at work they could tell. They offered to take me home just to get my medications. I politely declined. I don’t know how to say to them; I just don’t want to be around anyone. That I’m struggling mentally. I feel like crying all the time. It does help being put on tasks at work cause that means I’m not thinking about anything, and I’m just going through the motions of the moment. That’s the main thing I like when I’m busy is I don’t have time to think. Being too much in the head is frustrating; it makes me so emotional.

I could only imagine what people at work would think of my blog posts. I don’t want them to have hurt feelings. I just can’t help how I feel right now. I could only hope they would be understanding.

It’s hard to believe that this year is already 6 weeks in. It feels like last year went by really fast, even though it was tough emotionally.

Tomorrow is just my intake with my new therapist. I want to talk to her about everything, but I have to wait until our next meeting. I’m seeing my doctor for my medications Friday. I want to speak to him about how I’m feeling empty and alone. If I need to change medication to something else or bump something else up. Then Thursday I’m going to the restaurant at the school with mom dad and Richard. The dogs also have a vet appointment that day, and they’ll get the last of their shots for the year, and then we’ll be able to socialize them and take them places. We’ve been refraining from taking them outside the house and our yard due to not having all their shots. They told us Parvo can stay in the ground for up to 7 years. We wanted to take all precautions with them, so they don’t get sick. I’d feel terrible if they got ill, and it’s because we didn’t have them completely vaccinated. I want to socialize them and show them off around the town. THey’re such pretty puppies! I know everyone at work loves them. My boss always says that Angel is his then corrects himself and says our dog. I tease him and say I want puppy support lol. Also, after we get them their vaccines, we’ll be able to take them to dog obedience training. I want Angel to be trained as my service dog. My emotional support animal is my kitty Yuki.

I got a call to do a group interview at Torrid. I wanted to go so bad; I just have my medication doctor that day and time. I called them back and told them. She said they’ll make a note of it and would put me on the list for the next round of interviews. I really hope I’m able to get a job there. I think that would be a super fun job to do. I just hope they’d work with my volunteering schedule. If I have to take time off of school, I will. I’ll try to finish out this quarter and next quarter. I’d only have 2 more quarters to do, then I’d graduate with my general AA transferable. I’ve always loved going into that store. They know how to make you feel welcomed and excepted.

It’s Tuesday, and I’m doing better emotionally. Yesterday I was an emotional wreck. I still need to see a therapist I’m not better in that aspect. Today is all intake while I’m there, and hopefully, I’ll be able to make an appointment for next week. I want to talk to someone who is a neutral party, and I can basically spill all my thoughts and feelings to and will be able to help me make sense of my thoughts. I’m glad I’m seeing someone I know from DBT, and I know she’ll actually care about our appointments.

I’m sitting here in the bakery at the school waiting so I can get a coffee. I kept waking up last night. I think it was cause Brandon was at work all night and wasn’t there. I’d roll over and just have fluff in my face. The dogs took over his side of the bed while he was gone. I know they miss him. Angel kept whimpering when he came home after his first night gone. I want to talk about the pups all the time lol. They just make me so happy. Watching them grow is fantastic, and I can’t wait until they get fully developed.

But writing does help me so much more than I remember. It’s been so long since I’ve actually sat down to write. Coming on here to write out my thoughts and feelings is helping me to a point make sense of things. But it also helps to keep track of my emotions. I wonder if I should start labeling my posts like I would a DBT post? Maybe my new therapist will help me figure that out. I know some people will take a picture of themselves every day to show how much they change from day today. I want to get back into expressing myself with my clothes, especially with dressing goth. I miss it. I haven’t dressed full-on goth since the beginning of September. I miss it. I think I’m going to find all my black clothes and get back into dressing that way. I just have to go through my clothes and put stuff away. I can’t find a couple pairs of pants, and it’s bothering me. I don’t know where they are. Maybe I’ll do my makeup and dress full on and take pictures. I’ve lost a great deal of weight, so I know my dark clothes are going to be loose. But I know it’ll be fun to do my makeup and get all dolled up just for the fun of it. I can see the only endzone what people at work would say lol.

I definitely feel more alert today. Yesterday I was just dragging ass. I hate when I get that way cause then I get more moody. I’m going to talk to my medications doctor about it on my appointment Friday.

I have to do a makeup test in math today, and I forgot my homework. I’m going to see if I can email it to him since I forgot about it. I’m sure he’ll say okay, but you never know with him. I hope I didn’t miss too much in ASL yesterday. Since yesterday I just wanted to shut out the world. I’m wondering if people at work could tell I was like that. I want to say so much to them, but don’t feel that I can. I just don’t know if they’d understand why I do and say the things that I do. I don’t know, it’s not like talking to Cindy. She’s so understanding and non-judgemental. Maybe I should just take a day go set her and the kids and just be for a day or weekend. I think when I have time between homework, work, taking care of everything at home, and appointments, I should just take a day and see them. I miss spending time with them.

I’m at work right now, then I’m going to class, heading home, eating real quick, then going to the bank after, going to my therapist appointment. I’m not sure if I have anything else today, I don’t think I do besides homework. I need to study for my test in ASL. I can only hope she goes over it today in class for the one where we’re being signed to. Then find out if we’re doing the test where we’re signing to her that’s in the book or if it’s another one.

I have to say that I’m on my phone more in the morning at work than I am in the afternoons. I really should do something lol.

They say if you have anxiety, you shouldn’t drink coffee or will caffeine, but it tastes so goooooood! I barely got any sleep last night, yet I’m so awake what’s up with that? Lol. Maybe it’s the coffee 🤣.

So, I talked to mom on the phone, and she said my brother found a place we could afford that allowed cats and dogs. We’re going to go look at the home today and ask questions. I found out what test we’re doing, and it is the one in the book for ASL. I can practice that and put it into ASL form. I know I overthink it and I over sign some things, but I just can’t help it. I want to get better at doing it.

So far, only a couple people told me they like the long format of writing day by day than posting it. So, this super long post is for them! Lol!

So, yesterday I went to my counseling appointment, and we talked for a few, almost forgetting the time, so we went over the time slot by a couple minutes. It was nice to talk to her again. She wants me to do some mindfulness for when I reach for junk food and when I gorge myself with food. I’m trying to make a note of what I’m thinking about when I go for it and so far I’m thinking about school and what I need to do for homework. Haha, so my stress is the school for now lol.

I went to look at a place to possibly move to when mom and Richard. Looks like mom, Brandon, mom, Richard, me, and the girls are going to be moving in together. I don’t mind. It’ll be nice to see them a lot more. Yes, it’ll be a little cramped, but I don’t mind. We’re cramped now, lol. But the place is super lovely, and we’d be renting from them. They said they take care of everything no matter what, they’re pet-friendly with a one time fee for the pets, and if we can get a letter saying they’re a service animal of any kind, that fee will be waved. So, I got to talk to Tobi about possibly doing that. I had one for Rocko, but it has his name on it and won’t be able to pass it off for Angel. If not one for Angel, I want one for Yuki cause he’s my emotional support animal. I’m going to have Angel be my service animal with the proper training. That’s why I want them in obedience school. Oh, and the girls have rats. I love them! When they got them, they didn’t know one was pregnant, and now they have 10 rats lol it was only supposed to be 2.

Oh, a shocking thing happened last night! Yuki and Angel were actually lying next to each other! It’s surprising because he doesn’t like the pups. Here didn’t wake up when she laid down next to him.

Awwwwww the picture is too cute😍!

Yes, I’m one of those people who freak out over their pets, lol!

I really want tp grey my tattoo colored in I just have to wait for taxes. If Patrick took credit cards, I’d have it done already lol.

I have to say I’m in a good mood today. I think I really needed to see and talk to Tobi yesterday. I’m going to be seeing her on Wednesdays as a recurring appointment. I think talking to someone that understands BPD really helps.

Today, mom went to see her primary doctor, and then we have lunch, then it’s the veterinarian for the pups sp they can have their last shots, including rabies. We’ll also see how much they weigh. I hope mom was okay with putting the pups in the kennels. I don’t want her to hurt herself.

Man, it’s slow here at work, but I don’t mind it. Though I should read the shelves 🤔… I’ll think about it lol.

No one’s told me what they want me to talk about here, so I’m just doing my random thoughts. I hope whoever reads this doesn’t mind. I want to talk about different things. I’m just not sure what.

Hmmm, oh, in history class that’s online, I was put in the Indian gaming group, and we’ll explore Native American rights and the reasons behind having casinos. We were told my dad’s grandmother was full-blooded Cherokee, so I’m supposed to have some native American in me, but it doesn’t show on my DNA thing from ancestry. Maybe the amount is too small for the test. But I’ve always felt strongly about their rights and the rights of those around me. I want to learn more about the histories. I wish I could’ve attended the native American history assembly. Is assembly the right word for that maybe conference? Hmm, I don’t know… 🤔… but my history class is writing heavy, and I like that since writing helps me emotionally. I just have to finish reading the material and go on into the research for Indian gaming and talking to my group members. I wonder who’s in my group?

So, I went to lunch with my mom, dad, Richard, and his daughter Izzy at Orlando are the restaurants at the college. The food was so good! Here are pictures of what I got.

First, a salad is a Chinois Salad,
Mixed greens| carrots | snow peas | bean sprouts | crunchy won tons | Chinois dressing

For the main, I got Fried rice, but I asked them to add Kimchi to mine. This picture is without the Kimchi; it’s just what the picture that my husband got during his tasting of it.

Pineapple Cashew Fried Rice (Malaysia)
Stir-fried with ginger, lemongrass & curry | mixed vegetables |egg | toasted coconut | sweet chile sauce | lime

This what the dessert and it was my favorite! But I also love cheesecake lol.

I enjoyed myself thoroughly. Though Brandon got in trouble for something that was out of his control and they blamed him for the kitchen being backed up and someone taking over someone else’s table. I told him to talk to his teacher and ask why he was getting in trouble when that stuff was out of his control. His teacher apologized and agreed with him that he didn’t have control over that type of situation.

We went to the vet for the pups, and Angel weighs 38.1lbs, and Daisy weighs 35.5lbs. They have all their shots now and can go to obedience training. I still want to take them through training.

So, Yesterday I didn’t get a chance to write here after school. Yesterday I went to class and passed my ASL test. I tried not to overthink it, and I did better than usual. Though, I need to make sure not to drop my hands while I’m signing. I did that a lot, and I think it was because I was doing it while I practiced. I went to the store for cereal got Brandon an energy drink and donuts to Valentine’s day. We did really celebrate it aside from that.

I have a three day weekend. Monday is a holiday, so I won’t be going to project beauty share that day because their won’t be any mail that day. The sense I changed my work schedule I’m going to be able to go on Tuesday. I know they’re going to be surprised lol. I really look forward to the days I get to go there and help out.

I hope who ever reads this enjoys it. Thank you for your time on reading my blog.

Bruttles Gourmet Confections…

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Bruttles is a local store here in Spokane, WA. My husband noticed them while we were walking downtown. He know’s I have a weakness for sweets hehe. So we went in and it was a really cute store. It’s family owned and have been using the same recipe for 60 years. everything is still made the same way as it was back then.
Now bruttles are a really soft peanut brittle. Think of a gourmet butterfinger but better. These are so delicious. Oh and all their products are gluten-free besides the Bruttles crunch cause it contains pretzels. Which is amazing! I go there at least once a month. I’m so bad cause if I could afford to get it more often I would lol. They also do gift packs. (guess what everyone in my family is getting this Christmas hehe). I want to show you what I got in a gift pack that costs $5.75. This is one of the small ones. They do have one that costs $37.50. I’ll put a link at the end of the post to their website, if you wish to ordered some of this. Or if you live in the Spokane, WA area you can see where they are located. (^_^)
So here’s what’s in the small one I got…
It’s super cute, and comes in a see through package tied with a pretty ribbon(colors of ribbon and foil can vary)…

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1oz soft peanut butter brittle… 2 chocolate dipped peanut brittles… 1 soft caramel, this is soft and doesn’t stick to your teeth like most caramels…

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Here’s where the dipped peanut brittles look like opened…

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Website for store: http://www.bruttles.com/

Disclaimer *I purchased these products with my own money. They were not sent to me for a review. I reviewed them cause I really enjoy the products I purchased.*

Small update…

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I’m trying to post more on here. Trying to be more active and social. Key word there is “trying”. So lets see here… what’s new is the question…
Wedding – My maid of honor ordered her dress to wear. Not sure about my other bridesmaid. My mom found a dress she really like but it’s one we’ll have to save for. Still trying to figure out my makeup for the day. I want something that’s not gonna melt off or break me out after an hr of wearing it. So I figure try out a couple drug store foundations. If they don’t work out I’ll take them back and I might have to get a more expensive one. I’m hoping I can find one that’s cheap. I need to cut corners where ever I can. But I also want to look good. So we’ll see what happens. Still waiting for people to let me know if they’ll make it to the wedding. I wish the price for catering wasn’t so expensive. that’s where most of our money is going.

Family – Not much going on with the family.
Food – Been eating a lot of instant noodles, gluten-free of course. But sense we’re saving for the wedding we can’t afford much for food. So I’m having a really good dinner after the wedding. Though, knowing myself I’m still gonna try to save for something else lol.
Movies – A lot of movies I want to see but can’t go to. Mom and dad got my a couple movies for my birthday. Though, they got me one I already have so sadly we had to take it back. Mom just gave me the money for returning the movie. They also gave me a little bit of money to spend. Haven’t decided what I want to get yet.
Health – Not much change.
Books – Trying to get back into reading. Right now reading some stuff of gluten-free things. Seeing what I can do to help my tummy more. But first I’m catching up on anime. I watch it in Japanese with subtitles so that’s reading too. I think that counts for reading. lol.
Makeup – Not much change. Haven’t been able to shop very much. So sad…
I suppose that’s it for now. I’ll post again if I think of anything…. till next time… latzerz!

Updating on my life…

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So sorry it's been so long sense I've posted anything on here. Been busy and tired the past couple weeks. It's hard to think when feeling drained of everything. So, here's an update on a few things that's been happening sense my last update.

Wedding – Found the shoes I want for the wedding. Here's the link for the shoes http://www.ebay.com/itm/121110907956. So happy, they're very close to what I've been looking for. Crossing my fingers that they fit me (^_^). I'm also thinking of getting a corset to wear at the wedding and maybe before the wedding. Gotta measure myself. Hopefully I can find one where I can at least do some waist training. It'll also help my poster. We meet with the wedding planer in August so talk about decorations and what not. My brother is going to be recording the wedding for us and his wife Crystal is going to be taking pictures. That saves us some moneys. My other sis-in-law Cassie will be doing the music. So excited! I'm happy everyone is getting involved too. I'm hoping to get the stuff to make the bouquets soon. Yeah, making fake ones. But at least I know I can keep it for a long time that way.(^_^).
Family – Okay, so what's been going on with the Fam… Well, first… It was my dad's birthday Friday. He turned 48. He's not happy about it. But, oh well. My grandpa is gonna be having heart surgery. Not sure on the date. Have to ask mom again. Hope everything goes okay. Hmm, what else? Oh Brandon got a job at Ferraro's Italian Restaurant here in town. He likes it so far. I guess they have a singing waiter there too.
Food – Still going with Gluten-free. Tummy still doing good.
Movies – There's plenty of movies I want to see. Though, can't go to the theaters now sense we're saving for the wedding. So we're waiting for everything to come out on DVD to watch. We watched "Identity Theft" the other day that was a good movie. Not as funny as I had hoped it would've been but it was still a good movie. I want to see "The Purge" that just came out Friday. So gonna impatiently wait for it to come out on DVD. Dad really wants to see it too. Oh, I also want to see "Iron Man 3" and the new "Hansel and Gretel" movie. I still need to buy the last "Twilight" movie. Can't wait for December to roll around so we can see the next Hobbit movie. Oh, "Thor: The Dark World" Is coming out November 8th this year too. Excited for that too. Yeah, there's a lot of movies I want to see lol.
Health – My blood pressure is back to normal. It was a bit high for a while there. But I was able to get it back down to normal. Makes me happy sense high blood pressure does run in the family. Oh I've lost weight. I weighed 237 last i checked. So I've lost 20 lbs sense the beginning of the year. Another thing that makes me happy. We don't have a scale here so I'm not sure if I've lost more in the past couple weeks sense I weighed my self last. I can only hope that I have.
Been feeling really tired lately though. Just can't seem to wake up in the mornings lately. It's a bit annoying to be honest. I dunno just been drained. Maybe it's the weather heating up that's making me feel this way.
Games – Haven't really played many games lately. Except what's on my phone. Which is BINGO and a Bubble Totem. Oh, I just  remembered, mom and me went to the BINGO hall last month for mothers day. We didn't win anything but we had fun. I didn't post an update last month. I should have. Anyways, yeah, I haven't been playing any games really. Though, I have been missing WoW lately. But my comp is on the fritz so I get to miss it weather I like it or not.
Books – Haven't been reading much still. Thinking about it lately. But I don't know if I'll read anything if I don't have too.
Makeup – Still putting aside money for the wedding too. Feel so broke. I splurged this month on the Ariel Palette from Sephora. I shouldn't have but I was being impatient about getting it. I'm still trying to find makeup for the wedding. I want to get some L'Oreal Infallible shadows. There's three colors that I want to get as a possibility for the wedding. My main concern is foundation and concealer. I know what blush I want to use. I won't know about lip stuff till closer to the day of. Though, I'm pretty sure I'll just go with a light gloss. Still gotta get the bronzer that I want. Might get it next month. I want to film tutorials on YouTube But I'm still trying to figure out the lighting situation. I have so many Ideas that I want to try out and no light to film them in.

Hmmm, what else to talk about?

I'm not sure, so I'll just leave this post where it is. So till next time. Laterz!

Update!!!

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Okay, as always I'm slacking. So let's do another update as to what's been happening with my sense the middle of the month (^_^).

Family-
Well, first my Best friend left for Kentucky. So, she's far away. No matter how much I wanted to tie her up and lock her in a closet I restrained myself. I let her go. *sigh* Besides she would've liked that a bit too much LOL. Anyways, She's happy and that's all that matters to me. I will be kidnapping her for my wedding. There's no if's and's or but's about it. She's going to be here. hehe *evil thoughts* muwahahahaha. *cough* hmm, where was I? Oh yea, so she's down there. The rest of my family doesn't have much happening with them. Well, nothing major.
day cindy left
Next Subject! Food-
Brandon's and my 2 year anniversary was on the 25th this month. We spent the day at the mall. It was lunch time when we got there. We went to chilie's This is what we got!
Brandon got a Chicken Parmesan Pasta with Garlic bread.
brandon lunch
And I got the Caribbean Salad with Chicken. We had the choice of Chicken or Shrimp for both dishes. As you can see we both went with chicken. It was yummy! There's not many gluten free stuff on the menu. So, I didn't have very many options. Kinda sucked. But oh well, not many people out there have gluten free things on their menu's. I've come to find. Anyways, after that we did some unnecessary shopping 😛
my lunch
We went to the sweets factory! I have the colorful bag and Brandon has the darker one. The pop rocks and Hello Kitty are mine too (^_^)
Candy
This is a 5 lbs Gummy Bear! This is with it in the box…
gummy bear
This is without the box… It's on my Gothic Beauty Magazine to show how big it is… Brandon did take it to work and shared it with everyone. including the students (^_^)
gummy bear out of box

Games-
Haven't been playing any games very much. Not sense I canceled my WoW membership. Though, Brandon bought Resident Evil 6 I believe it's the 6th one. I'm not sure. Anyway, he got the newest one out. And he's been hooked to that. Otherwise not much else with games.

Wedding-
Okay, the wedding… Well, we went and met with the ministers. That went great. We gave them a deposit to reserve the day. The person who's going to do it is super nice. I'm really happy with them. Then after that we went and met with the cake decorator. She was super nice too. Not many places do gluten-free so I don't have many options with it. But it's okay I really like the taste of the cupcakes that she makes. So it all works out. Other wise not much else going on with the wedding planing stuff. 

Movies-
Brandon and me went to see The Croods on our anniversary. It was a really good movie. I love Belt (^_^) I want to buy it when it comes out. I know my dad wants to see it too. It's not so much of a love story as it is about a father understanding that change is okay. That it's okay for you to stray off the beaten path. New idea's can help you, not everything is going to kill you. So yeah, it was a good movie.

the croods

Health-
Well, my health hasn't changed much. Still doing the gluten free thing. and I helps my stomach so much. I do miss eating a lot of things but I'll live with out them. Oh and I'm trying to work out. not doing as much as Brandon I'll admit but I'm doing some. He's doing the P90X and he's slimming down a lot! He looks really good. I'm so proud of him. I'm trying to get where he's at. I know it'll take time, the main thing is I'm trying. But other wise not much else health wise.

Makeup-
Okay, I splurged while we were at the mall as you can tell just by the blush… This is a Tarte Amazonian Clay 12 hr blush in the color Dollface. I'm planning on wearing this at my wedding. It's so nice I really like Tarte blushes. Plus, this is the only Matte one out of them. I prefer matte blushes over shimmery sense I can get pretty oily on my cheeks. T zone get's dry and cheeks get oily… Weird I know… anyways… I'm planing on buying bronzer, foundation, eyeliner, gloss, highlighter, concealer, and mascara for the wedding. So, I'm gonna have a couple other expensive products posted on here later on. I have this for now. 

blush

Anniversary-
I took a pic of Brandon while we were at Chilie's. He actually had a mouth full of food when I took this hehe 😛 But he's so cute! I love my Teddy Bear!

brandon

I also went to Vanity. It was funny, Brandon and me were walking to GNC for him and I glanced into Vanity. And I saw these boots all the way in the back of the store on the side of the wall. Be surprised I saw them. I made a quick turn into the store and Brandon didn't even notice that I had went in till he was a few stores down hehe. Anyways, I love these boots! They had gold and silver and the gold was screaming "Buy me! Buy me!" I couldn't pass them up.

boots

So, sense it was buy one get one half off. I got these earrings too hehe :p

earings

Though, before we went to lunch we went to Barns and Noble. I wanted to grab the magazine Gothic Beauty. I love this magazine. While I was looking at guest books for the wedding I saw this Jack Skellington Journal. I couldn't pass it up. Yay!

B&N

After we left the mall mom took us to a mexican restaurant called Atilanos. I got nacho's. Brandon got a steak, shrimp, chicken, fajita thingy. He was happy and so was I. We had an amazing day. I love spending days like that with him. Just going to have lunch and spend some time together I'm a happy little girl.

Anyways, that's pretty much what's been going on with me the past two weeks. I'll post again when I got more (^_^). So, till next time. Laterz!

Sweetheart Voxbox…

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Got my sweetheart voxbox from influenster today. They sent it to me to try out the products to do reviews on. I can't wait! In it is secret clinical strength deodorant which I'm sure I'll love sense I use that brand already. Olay fresh effects cleansing system. Not your mother's shes a tease volumizing hairspray. Which I already own sense I got it in a beauty box a few months ago lol. Lastly, skinny girl on-the-go bar in Greek yogurt blueberry crisp. Though, I'm pretty sure I won't try this out sense it has wheat in it. So sad.

influentster 2013

I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes.

January Beauty Boxes…

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Well, I wanted to post my beauty boxes for January, though, I don't have my Glossy Box yet so that one will have a post of its own.
So here they are….

Beauty Army – There was a nail conditioning set by 'Acquarella'. In the set was a nail file, nail buffer, nail conditioner, polish remover.

beauty army jan 2013

Birchbox – Aerie shimmer fragrance, Embryolisse miracle cream, Number 4 clarifying shampoo, The Balm blush in the color Hot Mama, Deborah Lippmann stripper to go polish remover.

birchbox jan 2013

Ipsy bag – SoHo creasebrush, Big Sexy Hair hairspray, Josie Maran Argan oil, Pacifica Body butter in the scent Tuscan Blood Orange, Nail tini in the color Bloodymary, lastly a dark blue bag with white stars on the inside.

ipsy jan 2013

O.T.M. from Glamourdoll Eyes in it I got a shadow called Flourishing along with sixlets candy and a chocolate coin. Sadly I can't have the candy but that's ok. I love the shadow.

OTM GDE 2013

Popsugar – There's a stability ball, remix watch, epicuren discovery lip balm, popbar hot chocolate on a stick, jet-puffed vanilla marshmellow bits.

popsugar jan 2013