Itās the start of another week. I guess I shouldnāt start each post like that lol. Anyways, how is everyone doing? I hope all is well on your side of the screen. If not, Iām open to listening to your thoughts and problems. Iām more than happy to be there for you when you need it.
Iām trying to figure out what to talk about in this post. Iām at a loss for words at the moment.
We didnāt do anything for Valentineās day. We donāt celebrate it. I think the only holidays we celebrate are Halloween and Christmas. I donāt include anniversaries as holidays.
Speaking of anniversaries Brandon and my anniversary for how long weāve been together is 9 years married for 6 this year. Weāre planning on getting a cake from the students at the school and having lunch there for our 9th anniversary. Itās not a matter of price for doing the stuff there. We just want to support the students and help them with learning. We really like the programs taught at the school and wish to support them. I donāt know if I want to do a traditional cake or a cheesecake lol or even a mouse cake! I donāt know Iāll have to talk to Brandon and see what he wants. We got a couple months until our anniversary. Itās on April 25. Our wedding anniversary is on October 29. Itās hard to believe weāve been together for that long. Iāll definitely post on here of what we do on April 25 and October 29.
I want to go to places and eat different foods. I wish we had to money to go to places and eat food so I can talk about it here lol. I just love food. Everyone says I should be in the culinary program with how much I love to cook.
Well, I woke up with a nasty cough. I donāt feel sick, but Iām coughing like I am. So, itās time to take in a lot of vitamin c and garlic. Hopefully, it doesnāt turn into bronchitis. Whenever Iāve had a cough like this, thatās what it turns into.
So mom did the DNA thing too, but she did it onĀ https://www.23andme.com/ along withĀ https://www.ancestry.com/. Sheās looked on there and found possible matches to her DNA. She might have found a cousin in the UK. She needs to reply to their last email but wants me to proofread it lol. I told her I would just give me what she wants me to help her with, and I can do it. Hereās her DNA from 23andme.
And hereās her results for her ancestry.
I have to say we have a great deal of Irish and English in our blood. Iām not sure about my dadās side, but Iād think it would be the other half of mine. I have to say it makes me excited to possibly find some relatives that are from our blood since my momās parents were both adopted. Momās looking to get their original birth certificates so we can find out their original names and where they were born. Mom has also been talking to someone on here who could possibly be a cousin of ours. They live in the United Kingdom, and theyāre the nicest people. Itās fascinating to perhaps find a relative somewhere else and find out our blood families back story. If Brandon didnāt have what is in his blood on his birth certificate, Iād have him do a test too lol.
Yesterday was a holiday, so there was no school or project beauty share. Since there was no mail, there was no need for me to go to project beauty share. I have a strong cough right now, and Iām hoping I can get it under control so I can go to project beauty share. Brandon is thinking about volunteering at a homeless shelter and serve them food or help prep the food. Hopefully, he hears something from them. It would be suitable for his resumes and for scholarships.
Iām still putting in job applications, so hopefully, I can get a job outside of work-study that can probably be an all year round. Brandon and I are talking of going to Ferarroās for dinner sometime, and Iām going to put in a job application while weāre there. I havenāt heard from torrid again, so I donāt know if because I couldnāt go to the one interview, theyāre not going to call me for the next group interview. I think it wouldāve been fun to work there. I really like going in there. Everyone is so bubbly and happy. I love environments like that.
It was funny when I was at work on Friday Mariam came in and saw me. She told me she misses me during the day. I thought that was so sweet. Sheās pregnant, and her bump is so cute. Sheās having a baby boy, and her daughter said to name him Ryan, so they are lol. I think thatās awesome they let her pick the name. I have to say sheās the sweetest person Iāve met here.
Iām so nervous about my ASL test this week. I need to practice it since itās a paragraph and not a sentence. I have to practice nod, dropping my hands. I just got to find out if weāre doing a certain one or if weāre cam chose between two. Iād like to do the one I want b, ut if I canāt, Iāll need to translate the other into ASL. Everyone here told me to talk to one of the librarians since she used to be an interpreter. Weāll see if I donāt speak to her Iām going to try and get in to see the tutor. I need to go to the math tutor sometime since my math teacher doesnāt really teach.
I felt like doing my makeup for the first time in forever. I forget how much I enjoy the process. I need to get back into taking care of myself again. So I tried a new foundation. Weāll see how I do through a school day though itās still winter, so it should last no problem. It was weird doing my eyeliner with my contacts in, Iām not used to being able to see while I do my liner lol. I usually go by feel, and this time I could actually see what the hell I was doing lol. Need to practice with contacts in cause I had a hard time for being able to see youād think it would be easier lol. On my next check, weāre going to go do our taxes. Weāve got to do that, and we need to get the dogs in obedience school. Thatās going to be $60 per dog, so $120 total. They also need a grooming angel is looking a little rough lol. They also need their nails ground down. Theyāre a bit sharp. But yea, theyāre going to learn to sit, wait, leave it, and a few other commands along with teaching them not to jump. Thatās a big thing cause daisy full-blown jumped and knocked over mom onto the couch. So yeah, obedience class is necessary.
Iām sick with a viral infection that can possibly turn into bronchitis if it persists longer than 2 weeks, especially if I get a temp higher than 104. So, Iāve stayed home. I have meds to help me breathe because itās making it difficult to breathe, walking from building to building. I came home early yesterday cause of my breathing. It kinda freaked me out. The coughing is intense, and itās making my head hurt and throat swell up. Iām using cough drops like crazy, but it seems to be the only thing that helps to stop the coughing fits. I feel like shit, but I need to clean the house. I think Iām going to try and clean up a bit. Iām trying to get homework done since Iām stuck at home. I got my history for the week done. Iām hoping my temp goes down enough so I can go to class and do my test. Iāll probably be eating cough drops like candy, but at least they help the coughing fits. I donāt want to miss any more days. Iāve lost enough due to mental health and physical health.
So, I made me to school for my test lol. Sick as a dog, but Iām here. I donāt have a temperature, so they said Iām not contagious around people that only if I cough on someone.
While I was sick at home, I looked into trying to find our biological relatives. I found a nonprofit organization called W.A.R.M. they said they could help us, but itāll cost money. They require another $600 for both grandparents. They want$50 to start just to see if they were born here in Washington. If they werenāt, it might cost more. Oh, and weād have to sign a contract saying we wonāt look ourselves and wonāt post pictures or anything trying to find them weād also have to turn in the DNA test results we did to them. I want to do it because they gave access to resources that the general public doesnāt. Mom said sheās going to talk to Selynda and Floyd to see what they want to do. We told them we want to talk to them and see what they want to do. I really think itās a good idea.
Why is it when I donāt feel well, I donāt get much to say. Maybe itās a mental fog. Youād think it has a lot to say since Iām not in school when Iām sick, and even when I did come, I still didnāt have much to say. š¤·āāļø
So, Yesterday I almost had a panic attack. Shocking I know, I havenāt had one in so long it took me by surprise. I couldnāt think on what to do or how to react so I basically ran away. I needed to take my test, and I freaked out because I didnāt know we were taking the expressive test yesterday. I thought it was receptive. I was wrong, and I freaked out. I wrote the teacher apologizing and explained why I did what I did. She told me to make an appointment to take my test. I asked her when sheās available. I figured it was better to ask when sheās available instead of saying this is when Iām available. You make time. Iāll make time for her. I have to deal with the consequences of my running away. Even though I donāt feel ready for the test, Iām prepared to do it today. I donāt know if it was because I was around so many people, and thatās why I freaked or what. I donāt know; I just got to make sure it doesnāt happen again.
I got a job interview at Torrid on Tuesday. Iām happy! Itāll be an excellent job to have, and I know itāll run along with the bus schedule. I just hope if I do get the job, theyāll work with my school schedule until summer.
I havenāt heard from my teacher, so I think Iām going to have to wait to do my test.
I canāt help but feel so disconnected from people at work. I donāt know. I want to feel more than I do, but I donāt know if itās because I havenāt let my med increase get into my system enough yet. I just want to eat and shut myself in. I feel like Iām spiraling out of control emotionally. I donāt like this feeling. I havenāt felt this way in a long time, and I donāt like it. I wonder if Iām just taking on too much or if I need to change my meds or what. Iām at a loss of what to think or feel.
So, Iāve signed up for math 87 again since Iām having such a hard time with this class. I figured it wouldnāt hurt to take it over. I was told financial aid will pay for it one more time. I want to make sure Iām understanding the information before I get into higher math. Iām not getting that in this math class, but I do need to go meet with the tutors again. Iām signed up for ASL 123, basically ASL 3. Iām going to try and get my nerves under control, so I donāt have another freakout. I have to say that a panic attack scared me. I donāt want to have a seizure-like panic attack in class around everyone. I guess Iām just embarrassed to have them, and I donāt want anyone to see them who havenāt already. I havenāt signed up for my 3rd class, yet Iām going to talk to the counselor and see what I should sign up for since I canāt remember what my academic plan was. I have to follow that plan before I transfer to the falls for the rest of the librarian technician program. I told one of the librarians that I was going for that, and it surprised her lol. I want to keep working in a librarian setting. I really enjoy it. Iām going to keep an eye out for jobs for the libraries around here and see whoās hiring. I just want to learn more languages so I can communicate with those around me no matter their language.
Well, until my next post on Saturday, have a good day!