I live a simple life, some may call it boring. I'm very quiet and I have a hard time connecting to people. I don't party. I don't drink. I don't do drugs. The hardest drug I'll ever take is caffeine, gotta love coffee. I'm a home body.  I don't work, due to medical reasons. I love my family and what few friends I do have. I love my dog. I don't have much and I don't have much to give. I try to give what I can, when I can. I enjoy movies and books. There's not much that I want. Just the love of my family and friends. I do feel disconnected from the world at times. I don't do things on purpose. I may not think about what I'm saying but I don't do things on purpose. I apologize when I realize I've done wrong. I apologize when I don't even have to. I apologize for others mistakes, even when I know I shouldn't. I just don't know what else to say, people are strange. I feel very alienated from people. I don't know how to talk or interact with people. I do try, but when I do I just seem to make things worse. 
I just try to be me. I know I can't make everyone happy. Though, I try to do the best I can for there to be no conflict. Is that wrong? I'm not sure. People ask me to do things for them, such as make a phone call for them, but I never have any clue as to what to say. I'm never sure of what to say. All I'll do is tell the truth to someone and someone gets mad at me for just being honest. I never know how to react around people. I just try to be me, but I'm so clueless about things that it's difficult to do. I don't think anyone actually reads my post. No one has said that they do. So, I write on here to talk to myself. Sense I don't know how to talk to people. I don't know what to say to people. Here I sit in my own little world. Uncertain of everything. Wondering if anyone actually reads these. I guess it really doesn't matter sense I wouldn't know what to say anyways. 



I don't know why but lately I just want to snuggle. I just want the feeling of being held by the person who loves me. So at night I snuggle up to Brandon knowing he can hold me the way I want to be held. Though, while we snuggle one of us ends up tickling the other or licking the other on the face. We laugh and smile and it's just happiness that can't be duplicated. Now here's a quote about love…

“We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” ― Dr. Seuss

This quote means to me that a person can always be themselves around the person who loves them most. And they don't have to worry about being judged. That the other person will just smile knowing they are just as odd or they'll join in and be goofy with them. We all want to be with someone who is themselves and isn't fake. I've been judged all my life so I'm happy that the one I love doesn't judge me. 

I can't wait for thanksgiving. I can't stop thinking about the food. I also want Brandon to taste my family's cooking. But I guess everyone loves their family's cooking and thinks it's the best. Even so I'm still excited for him to taste the food. And speaking of cooking I want to cook a dinner for my mom. I want her to have some of her favorite dishes. Crab, lobster and she's asked for oyster chicken from my boyfriend. So, I'll see what I can do and make her. I hope I feel good enough to cook to. We have to work around Brandon's schedule but we'll get it done one way or another. 

But anywhos I'm gonna go for now. Laterz!



It's snowing! Though, don't got a whole lot yet, but it's still coming down. So, we'll see what it looks like in the morning. hehe. Anywhos, on to do another post. This is me trying to keep up with doing this lol. 

Okay, first subject! TV! Well, actually watching television online. I do that a lot sense we cut out cable, cause they were charging an arm and a leg for it. So now I rely solely on Hulu and Netflix to give me my TV kick. I just started watching Once upon a time along with the show Grim.
Okay, loving both shows. Once upon a time is about all the fairy tales but every fairy tale creature and person has been put into the human realm and can't remember who the hell they really are. Snow whites daughter comes after 28 years to save the day. It's a show  that ya more need to watch to understand. There's a lot of back and fourth with fantasy land and real life land so yeah.
Now for Grim, that too is about fairy tales but it leans more towards the darker side of them. The main guy in it is a grim and is suppose to kill the bad. That's what they call it in the show, so work with me. Anyways, he befriends this guy who can turn into a wolf but isn't a werewolf, they call him something else. Can't remember off the top of my head at the moment. They used a lot of funky names. One episode was based off of goldie locks and the three bears. Another i'm not quite sure, I just know it had bee people in it. And that those bee people want to help the grim. There's more then one grim and not all of them are nice. So yeah, that's the gist on that one. 
I still watch Bones, glee and been getting into the big bang theory. Those have too many episodes to try and describe what the hell it going on. Just go watch them, catch up to the current season and you'll know why I love em so much. 

So next subject… hmmm… not sure, didn't really plan this out just wanted to do another post… I dunno if I think of something I'll post again but till then. Laterz!


Okay so I want to get back into the habit of posting on here. So, here's another post. I'll start with a quote…

“Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.” 
― G.K. Chesterton

To me this quote means that, no matter the danger and no matter the size of it, we can still over come the things that stand before us. Weather it be a dragon, wizards, monsters, love, enemy's in our lives, or just life it's self. We can over come the dangers and struggles that lay before us. So, fight as hard as you can to defeat the demons and struggles in you're life. There is always hope, in over coming those hardships. 

So, that's what that quote means to me. If anyone reads my journal I'd love to hear what it means to you. 

I'm not sure what else to write right now so I'm going to leave it at this. Till next time. Laterz!

Another Update…


So, it's been sense September when I last updated this thing. I was looking at my journals past entries and I used to update atleast twice a week. Now I'm beyond slacking. It's been almost two months. So, I'm going to sit here and write a huge post to make myself feel better. 

Well, where to start this post at? 

I think I'll start with…… Reading.

I bought a kindle last month. I love the freaking thing! I've read for books so far on it. They are "Blood Of Requiem" By: Daniel Arenson, "Cameo the Assassin" By: Dawn McCullough-White, "Taming Fire" By: Aaron Pogue, and "Perfect Shadow" By: Brent Weeks. I'm in love with all of them. Well, I've enjoyed Brent Weeks works for a while now.
But the other three Authors I just discovered. I'm going to read the next one in each series. Except, "Perfect Shadow" that was more of a prologue to the Night Angel trilogy. A very long prologue, but one nonetheless. Now for "Taming Fire", I can't wait for the next part of it to come out. It has dragons, wizards and men. but it's not your typical book about them. The main character excepts to help a wizard out and become the mans weapon of sorts. But in the process his life gets turned upside down. He get's falsely accused of a crime, as well as the wizard, and they both end up running for their lives to the sanctuary of the wizards university. It's action packed and fun to read. I enjoyed it very much and it only costed me 99cents on Amazon for my kindle.
Now "Cameo the Assassin" is an interesting book. It is about vampires but the main character Cameo is a vampires puppet pretty much, but they call her a zombie. Because she is an undead but not a vampire. If that makes sense. The gist of the book it that, Cameo works for an association of assassins and while out on a job with a co-agent she ends up killing him. Thus, in turn, breaking her contract with the association. She befriends some outlaws and begins trying to help them. But in the process get a job from her master, the vampire, and she has no choice but to obey what he tells her. The is a lot of action in the book. The only thing that bothered me about the book, is that it was difficult to keep with who's perspective was who's. One minute it talks in third person next it talks in the first person. And to be honest it got a bit annoying. Though, yes, I am going to read the next book in the series because it is a good story just have issues with the narration of the book. 
Now for "Blood of Requiem", I enjoyed it very much. It's about a race that on the brink of extinction. Hunted down by a man who controls griffins. He is so bent on hunting the race he forgets that they are his people too. But he wasn't born with the ability to shift into dragon form so he loathes them. Because his father rejected him sense he didn't have the gift. He was denied his birthright and felt an outcast from his people. So because of that he swore to destroy the race into extinction. There is only five remaining survivors of the race. Four of them are eager to fight for their freedom. sense they can shift from human to dragon they are known as Weredragons. They all set out to find true dragons so they can reclaim their lands back and no longer fear being hunted. This book kept me eager to see what would happen next. I love the action in it. I have the next book in my kindle waiting to be started. I would like to know when the third one is going to come out but there hasn't been any announcement so I just gotta sit on my hands and wait till then. 

Now for my second thing to talk about… WoW.

I finally got a character to lvl 85. Though, they announced they're releasing another expansion. So I'll have to get to lvl 90 with that one. I'm slowly working so I can have 2 lvl 85's but been into reading a lot if you didn't notice. But the only reason why I was able to get a character to lvl 85 is cause my dad lvled him for me for awhile till I was close. Mostly so I could go into the headless horsemen. But other wise haven't been playing much on WoW.

Third… TV.

Been watching Glee of course and Bones. Love both shows. But I just started watching The Big Bang Theory and I have to say I like it. One of the characters on it called the police cause someone hacked into his WoW account. It was hilarious. Glee is getting interesting. Of course it has it highschool drama in it but I still like it. As for Bones, well, Bones is preggo and it's funny. I can't wait for the next episode tomorrow night. Oh and I still watch family Guy, so nothing new there hehe.

Fourth… Family

My Sis in law finally had her baby on the 7th. and my friend Gin had her baby OCt 25th. They both are absolutely adorable. But other wise not much going on with the family. 

Hmm, I'm running out of things to write so I'll try, key word try, to update again soon. No promises. But till next time. Laterz!